Parents, lift more, push less
Why do they go to great lengths to place their youngsters on a winning high school team? Are they trying to "live through their kids," as Evan Excell of the Utah High School Activities Association recently told Deseret Morning News columnist Doug Robinson? Are they looking to badger their children into winning an athletic scholarship?
Or is the pathology more complicated? Perhaps they remember the bad old days when they were picked last on the intramural team, or remember the heartbreak of being cut after two weeks of practice. Or maybe they've simply bought into the professional athlete's creed — winning is not only the most important thing, it's the only thing.
Perhaps they simply want their children to be strong, productive and self-assured in what has become a complex and bedeviling world.
Whatever they are thinking, however, they've missed the obvious: You don't make happy, successful children by driving them. Well-adjusted kids come from supportive parents. In other words, the parents of high school children need to do a little more "lifting" and a little less "pushing." It's one thing to be a "helicopter parent." It's quite another to be a "gunship parent."
In short, it's a self-absorbed world. And the parents of young athletes are becoming as self-absorbed as the more loutish professional athlete.
In his comments to Robinson, outgoing executive director Excell said, "Kids are getting tired of it all."
No doubt. And so are other parents, coaches, school administrators and anyone who has had to deal with a driven, ditsy parent. They not only make things worse for their own children but worse for all those who have the responsibility — and misfortune — of having to work with the child of a puffed-up parent.
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What about musically gifted children and eagle scouts. How many...
Anonymous | March 27, 2008 at 7:27 a.m.
