Time to cut each other a little slack
Ann Cannon
Dear Theater Patrons (especially the couple sitting right in front of us),
First, let me apologize. I'm sorry about the cell-phone thing. I truly am.
Trust me. I know how very annoying it is to have an experience (like movie viewing) momentarily marred because the prize idiot behind you forgot to turn off his or her ringer, which means you have to sit there and listen to the first few bars of "Highway to Hell" by AC/DC.
It's infuriating. After all, YOU turned off your cell phone because that's what grown-ips do before a movie starts. They. Turn. Off. Their. Cell. Phones.
(See also "Other Things Grown-ups Do": RSVP for wedding showers, fill up the ice cube tray with water before putting it back in the freezer, feed the parking meter, recycle, clean up after their dogs, spay or neuter their cats, return library books on time, not let the engine idle on a red-burn day, wash out their own stiff socks, floss regularly.)
And what's up with choosing "Highway to Hell" for your ring tone anyway? Dude! If you're really and truly committed to the idea of AC/DC, why not go with "Thunderstruck"?
So yeah. I totally get why you were bugged.
Still, the way you carried on (glaring, tut-tutting, making snide self-righteous comments loud enough for us to hear) you would have thought my husband and I were mass murderers! Hiding out at the Broadway Theater! Because that's what mass murderers do! They watch art-house films while they're on the lam! Didn't you know?
Anyway. Like I said. We're sorry. But I have a question for you.
Did you really think my husband was deliberately trying to provoke you? Do you think he said to me as we walked into the theater, "Yes! Time to turn my cell phone ON!" And then after that do you think he let loose with a maniacal sociopathic cackle?
(ANSWER: He didn't.)
Here's what I believe. ALL of us need to take a deeeeeeeep breath and relax. OK? We need to remind ourselves of the times we've accidentally left our cell phones on. Or unintentionally cut someone off while changing lanes. Or drove a little too slowly down a street because we were looking for an unfamiliar address. Or opened a car door and ding the car next to us. Or abandoned a shopping cart in the middle of the grocery aisle because we were suddenly distracted by the sight of artichokes on sale. (M-m-m-m-m-m! Artichokes!)
We need to remember each and every time we've made other people want to flip us off.
And then we need to cut each other a little slack.
So come on, everybody. Time for a group hug.
E-mail: acannon@desnews.com
Recent comments
Crazy, why did you not turn it off after the FIRST time???
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